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Survive The Affair And Stay Together

Healing The Pain Of Infidelity And Melting Your Man’s Heart

April 22, 2015 by Yvonne Finn

Healing the pain of infidelity can seem like an unrealistic and impossible dream when you first learn of your spouse’s devastating betrayal.

When a couple first get together to start their relationship, everything can be so rosy, perfect and happy that infidelity and the ensuing pain that it causes is unimaginable.

But when your relationship has been damaged by infidelity and you want to heal from the pain and eventually mend and save your marriage then you must find effective ways that will help you do this.

At first, the thought of forgiving your cheating spouse is not something you feel you will ever be able to do; however, this is something you will need to do, not just for them but for you and your marriage.

Healing the pain of infidelity starts with your decision to forgive your partner and accept that their cheating is now :

  • An irreversible part of your relationship story

  • And which you will now work on to put behind you and move on together.

Until you have taken this first step there will be nothing on which to rebuild your marriage!

Forgiving and accepting your spouse’s infidelity does not mean that you condone it or suddenly stop feeling betrayed and angry, it simply means that you are no longer trying to deny or block it out.

It has been said, that you can’t fix a problem until you accept that there is one and that is why facing your partner’s infidelity is so important in the mending of your relationship.   

Unless your spouse has become a serial cheater and no longer cares about you and your marriage then your willingness to forgive them will provide a starting point to help with healing the pain of infidelity and Saving Your Marriage

Time and loving commitment are also necessary and integral when you want to begin healing the pain of infidelity.

If you are the spouse who has been cheated on you will need to tell your unfaithful spouse exactly what you will need from them in order to feel valued, safe and secure in the relationship again.

Never be pressured into “moving on” until you feel that you have worked through the anguish and pain of your partner’s infidelity.

Sometimes a cheating spouse may want to quickly reconcile past their infidelity and sweep the whole hurtful event under the rug.

This is perhaps because of the shame and guilt that they are feeling, due in part to the pain they have caused you by cheating.

However, if you do not take the time that you feel that you need to heal from infidelity and put it firmly in the past then you might find the unresolved anger re-surfacing again and again in the future which will cause setbacks and make the process of reconciliation longer than it needs to be.  

Learn how to forgive your spouse and work through the pain of infidelity

Then Forgive And Melt Your Man’s Heart With These Steps

melt-your-mans-heart

Survive The Affair Together

April 1, 2015 by Yvonne Finn

Survive the affair together even if only one of you cheated but you want to save your marriage.

Fortunately, there are many couples who have managed through:

  • Hard work
  • Loving commitment
  • Good guidance AND support

To rebuild their broken marriage and go on to live happy and enjoyable lives TOGETHER.

To survive the affair together, both of you will have to decide that your marriage is:

  • Worth saving
  • Worth working for

It will not be easy and there may be many setbacks as you work to:

  1. Rebuilding trust
  2. Control haunting infidelity images
  3. Learn to forgive
  4. Re-establish intimacy, etc.

An affair is one of the most damaging events of any marriage and some relationships
do not survive the trauma.

Will yours?

If you decide that your marriage still has value to you and both you and your spouse
want to survive the affair together.
Then I would like to recommend the following resource to help you heal and rebuild your
relationship.
After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful

Survive an Affair FREE course
Click here and learn how to survive an affair (FREE course from Dr. Frank Gunzburg)

To survive the affair together you must resolve not to call it quits before giving your
marriage every opportunity to be healed.
Even if all you can do right now is meet each others basic needs, then do that!
Keep the lines of communication open even if all you do is just say “Hi” or “Goodnight”.

 

Generously Forgiving Makes Surviving An The Affair Possible

February 17, 2015 by Yvonne Finn

Generously forgiving your spouse can make it more possible to survive the affair
and stay together.

I am not discounting or minimizing how hurt you feel and how difficult it can be
to be forgiving of such a betrayal in your marriage.
However, forgiving while still bearing a grudge towards him or her will only poison
the relationship going forward.
Many spouses say they have forgiven an affair but then they will never again trust
their mate.
Is that really forgiveness? And can a marriage be all that it should be without mutual
trust?

I don’t think it can and I hope you don’t either!

Forgiveness for such a traumatizing hurt as an affair will not come easily.
So, don’t rush it or try to sweep it under the proverbial rug.
Take your time! Talk through it. Get the root cause of why the affair happened.

Then when you feel ready to forgive, do so with all the generosity that you can.
Forget the grudge bearing, tight- fisted  forgiveness that some couples have in
their relationship with each other.

Marriage requires unrestricted intimacy and closeness.

You will not enjoy that without trust!

Forgive and learn to trust again …

Read more about forgiveness here …

 

 

Coping With Emotional Affairs

January 22, 2015 by Yvonne Finn

What are emotional affairs and how to cope with them and save your
marriage or relationship?

According to Oprah.com, emotional affairs are the new adultery.
Is she correct?
Well, many of these types of connections do lead to physical cheating.

But even when they don’t they can be devastating to the other partner
in the relationship, because it is felt as a kind of betrayal of intimacy.

Some spouses even go so far as to say that they could handle a sexual
affair  by their partner better than an emotional one!

Whether that is true or not; emotional affairs are confusing and damaging
to the healthy connections needed to maintain the primary union.

To cope with an emotional affair both spouses must agree that it is an issue
AND the one having the affair must decide to stop it immediately with no excuses.
That is to say: The emotional affair is not going to be allowed to cause irreparably
harm to the marriage.

Because an emotional affair is often nonsexual the spouse who is having one can claim
that there is no harm being done.
However, that is not true for the partner who feels left out and emotionally betrayed.

Now Discover “Getting From Hello To Forever Together

 

Saving Your Marriage – An Alternative To Marriage Counseling

November 15, 2014 by Yvonne Finn

FREE Report: Alternative to Marriage Counseling

Download this FREE alternative to marriage counseling report from Marriage Sherpa. Add your name and email below to receive this FREE report and Marriage Sherpa’s FREE course. This program outlines the keys to:

  • Save the marriage yourself…
  • Bring your spouse home…
  • Restore the trust…
  • Rebuild the honesty…
  • How to forgive…
  • Have fun again…
  • How to talk about…
  • Rebuild the intimacy…

First Name
Email

Saving your marriage -an alternative to marriage counseling blueprint is for those couples
committed to saving their marriage relationship on their own.
They are very sure and clear-eyed about the work and emotional strength that it will
take to get past the trauma of infidelity.

They know that they will have to address some of the following issues successfully if they want
to save the relationship:

Want more exciting marriage and relationship advice?

Then please head over to Your Relationship Whisperer now
Here you will discover that your marriage can actually can setup to
succeed or fail from the moment you decide to become a couple.
How honest you are with yourself and each other can set the tone for
how your relationship going forward.
This is the reason it is the most important component of a long-term
pair-bonding.
No relationship can just be setup and left on its own!

It must be nurtured and cared for and adjustments will be necessary along
the way.

This is just some of the advice that you will discover at:
Your Relationship Whisperer

How Long Will It Take To Rebuild Your Marriage Post Affair

November 14, 2014 by Yvonne Finn

Only you can determine how long it will take to rebuild your marriage post affair!

You see,  you can only rebuild your marriage after you have decided that it is worth saving in the first place.

If your spouse has damaged your marriage by having an extramarital affair your feelings of anger and betrayal can be so devastating that you might feel that your marriage is at an end.

At first, you cannot see how there is any way to rebuild your marriage post affair.

Here is this person who you trusted to keep their promised to love and be faithful to you forever now bringing such shame and hurt into your life.

The pain and heart-break that you feel cannot be measured and will for a time seem insurmountable.

The recurring images of them together is so hurtful that you might not even be able to speak to your spouse much less see yourself staying in your marriage.

How long will it take to rebuild your marriage post affair?

That question can only be answered after you have truly coped with the trauma of the affair, and that will take time and should NOT be rushed.

Just as with any grieving process, there are stages as you progress to closure.

Healing from your spouse’s cheating is no different, you must take the time you need to go through each step.

Then your cheating spouse must be willing and committed to helping you believe in them again, rebuild your self-esteem and recreate the intimacy in your marriage.

So, how long it will take to rebuild your marriage post affair will be contingent on at least two things:

  1. First you must decide to save your marriage
  2. Then you must work on feeling good about yourself and you spouse again

Can this be done? Yes! Many couples have been able to rebuild their marriage post affair and I am rooting for you being one of them.

I wish you healing in your marriage!
Click the link for a very helpful resource on how to forgive and work thorough the past


Yvonne

 Discover Exactly What You Need
to Say and Do to Save the Relationship
Immediately after an Affair

 Click The Link Below

Help You Survive The Affair

Save Your Marriage With The 21 Step Spontaneous Healing Plan

November 10, 2014 by Yvonne Finn

FREE Report:

What to Do RIGHT Now After the Affair

Get instant access and uncover the 21-most effective steps marriage counselors are using to help their clients survive an affair. Add your name and email below to receive this report and Marriage Sherpa’s FREE email course for surviving the affair.

  • Erase the images from your mind…
  • Rebuild your self-esteem…
  • How to talk about the details…
  • How to find out why it happened…
  • Why you don’t need to forgive…
  • 10 things you must do TODAY…
  • Decide if you should stay or go…

First Name
Email

Save Your Marriage With The 21 Step Spontaneous Healing Plan

Survive the affair together is achievable if the couple decides to get all the help they
can.
It will need committed effort from both partners.
The first thing that will need to be decided is the question of whether the couple want
to save the marriage and remain together.
That is however, only the first step in what will most likely be a long and painful
journey with some setbacks along the way.

Some couples are able to work through this painful time on their own while others will
need the expertise and counseling of appropriately trained professionals.
For those couples who choose the “do it yourself” path there are some very helpful resources
like the one in this post.

It is called The 21 Step Spontaneous Healing Plan.
It is a free report and will help to know what to do right now after the affair and every step
to take going forward …

Get instant access and uncover the 21-most effective steps marriage counselors are using to help their clients survive an affair.
Add your name and email into the form above to receive this report and Marriage Sherpa’s FREE email course for surviving the affair.

  • Erase the images from your mind…
  • Rebuild your self-esteem…
  • How to talk about the details…
  • How to find out why it happened…
  • Why you don’t need to forgive…
  • 10 things you must do TODAY…
  • Decide if you should stay or go…

Survive The Affair Together Even Before Your Marriage

November 6, 2014 by Yvonne Finn

You can survive the affair together even before your marriage!
At first glance that statement might sound as if am saying
that you or your spouse should plan to cheat or even condone adultery.

That is emphatically not what I am saying!

However, we are human and as such we make mistakes, even one
as painful as an adulterous affair in your marriage.

When you are saying your marriage vows, really pay attention
to what you are promising to do together forever.
Remember that line “for better or for worse”.
Keep it in your mind as you go forward with the marriage.

All of us expect and gladly accept the good in the marriage.
What about when the worse comes along?

Obviously, you would hope never to experience anything as painful
as an affair in your marriage and will do all you can to avoid having
either your partner or yourself commit this transgression.

However, if you both decide ahead of time that nothing except abuse
or death will separate you then you can survive the affair together
theirs or yours.

Will it be easy? Not on your life! Saving your marriage after an
affair will most likely be one of the most difficult things you ever
have to go through in your life.

The feelings of anger, betrayal, hurt and resentment will seem to
overwhelm you and you will want to give up and start over with
someone else.

And if after some time you really feel absolutely unable to see the
challenge through – you might have to end your marriage.
But I caution you to ensure that you have given the effort to save your
marriage all that you have.

Take as much time as you need or are willing to give each other.

Do not be influenced by friends, families or counselors.
You are the expert in your marriage relationship.
By all means seek out unbiased input from individuals who you
trust to be objective and fair minded to the situation.

Here’s How Your Marriage Can Survive And Thrive After Infidelity

Look For My eBook “Getting From ‘Hello’ To Forever Together” Coming
Soon To Amazon …

Physical Or Emotional Cheating In Your Marriage

October 7, 2014 by Yvonne Finn

Have you experienced the trauma of physical or emotional cheating in your marriage?

Then I am sure you have also read or heard the definitions and distinctions between
the two.

One thing is clear, both of these events inflict immeasurable pain, and depending
on the personality of the victim, they can be equally devastating personally and/or
to the relationship.

The questions have been asked, “What is the difference between emotional and
physical affairs”?
Or, does emotional affairs hurt as much as sexual affairs?

Or, is it cheating if there is no sex”?

For anyone who has experienced the terrible hurt caused by either physical or
emotional cheating in their marriage those questions and others like them are
non-issues.

The only thing these sufferers know for certain is that they are in
unimaginable emotional and psychic pain due to the one-sided action of
someone who they loved (probably still loves)and trusted.

Is is possible to protect your marriage from emotional or physical
cheating?
Or, to rebuild the relationship if cheating has already happened?

Well, life may seem to hold no 100% guarantees but some efforts
are more than worth the time and energy we put into it.

I believe saving your marriage is worth the effort and hope you do too.

Click on the link below to discover a resource that could help you to:

Break Free From The Affair And Save Your Marriage Forever!

Is Divorce Really Your Only Option?

September 26, 2014 by Yvonne Finn

If you have asked yourself if divorce is really your only option for challenges in your
marriage, then my guess is that you are looking for ways to save your marriage; not
end it.

For many couples divorce seems to come as a knee-jerk reaction to any and all issues
in their relationship.

Sometimes spouses threaten each other with divorce as a means to getting their
own way in the relationship.

I  have asked myself why this is so.

It takes two people to make a marriage work successfully: yet very often it only
takes one to decide to end it.

I am not saying that if one spouse truly wants out that the other spouse can hold them
against their will, or fulfill the marriage commitment on their own.

What often happens though, is that one person proposes divorce and the other partner
becomes hurt and offended, feels rejected and goes along even though that is not what they want.

No matter how egregious the offense “is divorce really your only option”?

If you are committed to doing what it takes to avoid divorce and save your marriage then I
HAVE GOOD NEWS AND A STEP BY STEP GUIDE FOR YOU WHEN YOU CLICK HERE!

 

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