Your husband has cheated and you want to end his affair but don’t think
you can find the strength.
The revelation of his infidelity has sucked the life out of you and the marriage.
It is a gut kick that feels like a death blow! You want to scream and run away.
The anger and pain is like a living thing inside you and you feel you will
never get past it.
Finding the energy to save your marriage seems like an impossible task.
However, one thing is certain …
You are not the first woman to discover that her husband has cheated
Sadly, you wont be the last one either.
I know that does not help you as you are experiencing the recent and
raw knowledge of his betrayal.
But just know that many of these hurting wives have discovered that
they can survive the affair and save their marriage.
And you can too; given time and effort.
Ensuring that your husband end his affair is key to mending and moving
on in the marriage.
If he is ambivalent about closing the door on the affair then you could try
to do it for him.
But accept that this might not work.
You see your spouse opened the door of your relationship and invited this
other person in and it will carry more of an impact if he lets them out and
closes the door.
Not only will it more powerfully state to the other woman that the affair is
truly over: it will prove to you that your husband has taken full responsibility
for having the affair in the first place.
Never let yourself believe that your spouse has all the power in whether to end
his affair or not.
If you are angry about the affair and not afraid to let him see it in full force then
you have high regard for yourself and the relationship. That is after all why you
feel so betrayed in the first place.
Let him do the work and show the effort he needs to convince you that he wants
to save YOUR marriage.
Express to him that you want to be sure that his behavior that led to the affair
has changed and only his SINCERE actions going forward can rebuild the trust
between the two of you.
You do have the strength to end his affair.
You can take the following three steps:
1.Make a decision
Are you are going to forgive and stay together?
Does he want to stay in the marriage?
Will he commit to doing what it will take to rebuild your relationship?
Only the two of you can decide.
2.Draw a line in the sand
Must he end the affair right now on the spot or can you live with the knowledge
that he is seeing someone else while he works through his feelings?
Some women can and some absolutely will not even consider such a scenario.
It can have some benefits in that when the affair is finally ended and he decides
on saving your marriage then you can know he will no longer be ambivalent about
the two of you.
In either case be strong in your position.
3.Don’t be a pushover
Once you have stated your position clearly to your spouse then hold firm.
Establish clear boundaries and timelines for what he needs to do.
Try not to judge your mate or be one up manning them because of the affair.
Just stand firm so he will not drag his feet in coming to decision about your
life together and …
Saving Your Marriage
Have you been hurt by a cheating spouse? Did you cheat on your spouse?
Want help to heal, forgive and rebuild your marriage?
Then follow Dr. Gunzburg free three step process to rebuild trust and
intimacy in your marriage …
Survive an Affair FREE course
Click here and learn how to survive an affair (FREE course from Dr. Frank Gunzburg)